Why?

High school isn't much different from middle school, just the more and harder work. Oh and the guys aren't any more mature either.:) anyway the topic on my mind the most lately has been love. i mean it's kinda hard to avoid. there's a guy in my life that i have liked for 3 years and he barely knows i exist. i think i might love him even though he's cocky, arrogant, and sometimes a douchebag. he's also in love with this other girl. boy do i now how to pick 'em. why do we always fall for the one we can't have? why do we fall and aren't caught? why, for once, can't life just go the way we want it to? these things run through my mind all day, every day and i can't stop wondering. i'm stuck on a guy i'll probably never get but i can't move on. why does God put people like that in our lives is it to test us, or show us what we can't and will never have? to get him or get over him would mean the world to me. he takes up most of my thoughts every day and i cry for him. he's broken my heart even though i've never had him. is that love or just not getting what you want and getting upset over it? great more things to ponder about. i'll write more later. thanks for reading my ranting.